Transgender Women in the Pulpit: Meet Rev. Dr. Phillippa Phaneuf

Ready for an inspiring story? Meet Rev. Dr. Phillippa Phaneuf (pronounced fa-nuff), a visionary transgender woman serving a United Methodist congregation in Western New York. Rev. Dr. Phaneuf came out to her congregation in November of 2025, and the story made national news.

Let's jump right in to our questions.

Coming out is hard. Coming out as a clergy person often adds layers of challenges. Did being in ministry delay your transition in any way?

Not consciously, but looking back, I could see how subconsciously ministry as well as so many other things in my life probably played into delaying. I think the biggest delay for me was fear. But also, just really a lack of awareness, a lack of understanding where I was at. Dropping the fear coupled with development of awareness really helped my decision in September of last year to start taking hormone replacement therapy.

This is your first Pride month since coming out. What's it been like for you?

Like with everything this year, it's been kind of surreal that instead of seeing things from the perspective of ally, or from the perspective of masking as cis male, Pride month has a certain level of heightened solidarity for me. I'm still getting my sea legs, for lack of a better term, for where my place is in the midst of all of this, as to how involved or how proud I should be during Pride. I'm looking forward to more opportunities and more experience in how I can be helpful in increasing visibility, increasing pride, and helping to save lives.

Hopefully this interview will be part of those expanding opportunities for making a difference!

The Where True Love Is movement receives a barrage of messages filled with anger, accusations, and threats of violence every week. You've described getting a similar response in the months since coming out publicly. What advice do you offer to others who are subject to this sort of messaging?

My advice would be: know your own bandwidth. Take care of yourself first. With a healthy level of self-care and a grounding in self-worth, making sure you're surrounded by affirming folk, you can then gauge how to respond to the sort of messaging that's out there.

A very helpful element for me is to not take things personally. 90% of things sent our way are not personal. The anger, accusations, and threats of violence always, always, say more about the person that's throwing those things than those of us who receive them.

It's important also to stay grounded in awareness, and loving kindness. I find the practice of mindfulness meditation, prayer, whatever you'd like to call that to be very helpful because it keeps me focused on loving kindness, compassion, shared joy, and equanimity. Operating from those places allows me to remember that the anger is impersonal. These people do not truly know me. They're working from a lack of understanding.

So again, I think the most important element here is to take care of ourselves, to be grounded, to be affirmed in love, so that when we receive this negative warfare, whatever you'd like to call it, we are equipped to respond with loving kindness.

Tell us about positive commentary you receive. Does it help balance the negative?

I would say balance is an understatement, in that I really disregard the negative. The positive commentary that I receive is so much more personal. There's understanding in it. There is solidarity. There's a shared joy, a shared love that's being expressed, and that so far outweighs any of the impersonal negative elements that are out there. It's been a deep honor that my story has been helpful for so many people.

I am, in many cases, speechless about the impact that it's had, and that it matches with the intention of wanting to be helpful, loving, and kind to siblings. And no matter where they're at, if we can model a sense of living that is joyful, authentic, and filled with loving kindness and peace, it's hard to argue against.

In one of your social media posts, you referred to God as creator of the multiverse. We love this so much! Tell us more.

I really think that in the 21st century, our theology, liturgy, prayers, and understanding of God, we have a responsibility to update our language, to match what we're learning scientifically, so that we move from talking about God being a god of the world, or god of the solar system, or god of the universe, because scientists are increasingly acknowledging the possibility that there are more dimensions than just this third dimension. We need to look at quantum theory, and listen to theoretical physicists and astrophysicists so we can understand and develop an even deeper language that expands further the reach of God's Creative Transformation. (Editor interruption: we asked Rev. Dr. Phaneuf about her capitalization of the term Creative Transformation, and she explained that she uses it as another term for God, as used in the process theology tradition, because the divine is seen as an ongoing action. Google it! Great stuff!) So instead of limiting God to just being a god of a universe, that God is the creator of all universes. "Universe" becomes a misnomer, and we can see God as a creator of all of the dimensions, even the ones that we cannot see. How does that expand our thinking in ways where we can still join the ancient songwriter saying "God's ways, God's understanding, is unsearchable" so when we think of all that has been created, it's too wonderful for our minds to be wrapped around? I love the idea of awe and wonder moving us to being more humble in our understanding, and therefore freeing God from the box we try to contain God within.

You've verbalized our own expanding view of God, and our desire for expansive language. Thank you for summarizing this so beautifully.

What do you want queer people who are afraid of church and of God to know?

Very interesting choice of words: afraid of church. And I totally get that.

I want people who are afraid of church to know that in a lot of cases, the fear is warranted, and you should go with your gut. There are places that claim to be churches but are more affinity groups. They aren't gathering for the sake of loving kindness, and their priority isn't belonging, but behavior management or belief management. Those places are traumatic. We have evidence to show a deep reason to be fearful of these places.

I would recommend that queer people research churches they may want to attend. Maybe even contact the pastor ahead of time to have a conversation as to whether that church would be a safe space for them. I would recommend highly having preliminary conversations, and even being so bold as to ask questions straight out. Will I be safe in your congregation? Will I be loved? Will I be seen as worthy of love and affirmed in who I am right now, and not seen as some sort of project that needs to be worked on?

That's why it's so important for churches, not just the pastor, but for the congregations themselves to let the public know, in no uncertain terms, that everyone is welcome, without exception. Maybe even so far as to simply say, you will not hear hate preached from the pulpit. That we focus on belonging, rather than on behavior or belief management. That God loves them exactly the way that they are right now. And if they never change, God still loves them beyond all measure.

It's through that kind of unconditional love that Creative Transformation can actually happen. If we're afraid we are not fully loved, we are locked into systems.

So what do I want queer people who are afraid of God to know? That there's been a lot of versions of God that have been offered throughout the years. That there's always this implicit bias of who God is being conveyed. For me personally, I believe that God is a God that loves beyond all measure. Loves us exactly the way that we are right now. And that God would love us fully and completely with no desire whatsoever to objectify us or to see us as some sort of project. That God's love is an uncontrolling kind of love. That God takes in who we are right now and responds with grace and immeasurable love in every single moment. And like a healthy parent relationship, God is moved and God is changed by the Creative Transformation that happens within us, so the relationship grows and develops. Where there is Creative Transformation, there's shared joy. And where there's suffering God also suffers with us.

What wonderfully encouraging words. Thank you.

We were honored to have Paula Stone Williams write a foreword for our Transfigured devotional. Since then she's written a book titled As a Woman, What I Learned About Power, Sex, and the Patriarchy After I Transitioned, which shares her experience of having lived with male privilege and then losing it. Is this something you're also experiencing? If so, can you tell us what you've learned about privilege so far?

Already within the months since coming out, I've learned a great deal about how much privilege I carried and experienced. And I recognize that there are elements of privilege that I still retain. There might still be some privilege left in the bank of having been white cisgender male presenting.

Within ministry, and also in daily life, my perspective, vision, or ideas wouldn't be questioned previously. Now some things are getting challenged rather than taken at face value. I'm experiencing more fact-checking from people than I did previously. Some of this may just be that my awareness is heightened. But sometimes, I can definitely feel that I'm being second-guessed about things. This isn't all bad. Fact-checking is good. Challenging notions is good.

I think what needs to happen isn't that I should be challenged less, but that cis-white males should be fact-checked more. That's the takeaway. I wish there was more challenge going on regardless of gender.

Even preaching has resulted in questioning about what I'm saying from the pulpit. I'm not sure if that's due to being transgender or due to being considered fully a woman preacher, but nevertheless, I think any opportunity for dialogue and for challenging notions can be helpful. If it's done in a spirit and attitude of loving kindness, and really, honestly, a quest for understanding one another.

More than anything else, my appearance has become a topic of conversation. Within the past six months, conversations, compliments, as well as comments about how I look outnumber similar statements from the 50 years previous. I've gone decades without anyone commenting on my appearance as a man. And now I hear compliments and comments regarding how I look regularly. That is definitely something I'm still getting used to.

What surprised you most about transitioning?

I've been pleasantly surprised with people I judged incorrectly because I thought for sure they would not be affirming, but in fact have become a dear, dear affirming presence in my life. And also, surprisingly, I prejudged and assumed that others would be very affirming, and I've not heard from them since my coming out on November 23rd. As I deepened awareness of my own prejudice, I realized I'd created a tally of those I thought would be affirming, and those who would be rejecting. Some have proven to be so loving and kind, and I've lost some people who I thought were dear friends, who were not there when I needed them most.

Another surprising element that I think should be included is ageism. There's an overwhelming perspective that older adults would be less affirming than younger adults. I have not found this to be the case at all. Affirmation and rejection transcends age. Experiences with loved ones, previous experiences in people's lives, as well as long-held beliefs and convictions make the difference as to whether or not a person is affirming or rejecting, loving or hateful. And so I would encourage people to examine their own perspectives and to see whether or not they're like me and initially making judgment calls on people when an open-minded approach might be more helpful.

Another surprising element is how much more affirming women in my life have been, and how much harder it has been for men to come to an understanding of the transition. I'm not sure what the antecedents are for that difference. It may be localized to my particular experience, so I don't want to paint a broad brush stroke. I can only say, in my experience, I have found women to be much more affirming, initially and openly, proudly affirming of my transition.

What advice do you have for allies who want to be encouraging?

My advice is to read Jeanne Gainsburg's book, The Savvy Ally, and then engage in conversations about allyship. To practice loving-kindness. One of the things that could make a huge difference is to be willing to be seen in public with us. To know that you're not ashamed of us, that we're not an embarrassment, that we're not just friends in name only, or under certain circumstances, but that you'd be willing to have lunch out someplace, or a meal with us, and to walk down the street with us. And I think that that would be really, really helpful. I've lost some of that in transitioning. People who used to want to meet with me no longer extend invitations to meet in public.

Is there anything else you'd like to share about your life as a transfeminine pastor in 2026?

I would say that... I'm happy. I'm happier than I've been in a very, very long time, because I can be myself. I hear from people that I'm coming across more at ease, that I'm not second guessing my approach to things as much.

In the polarization of our society, assumptions are made about political standings. Some people thought my coming out was a political statement. In reality, my coming out was a personal statement. That's why I didn't come out during the sermon, I did it as an announcement at the end of the service, and that video has gone viral. I wanted the congregation to know, because my appearance was going to change, and questions were going to come up. From a pastoral perspective, I wanted to make sure my congregation knew I loved them enough, that I didn't want them distracted or worried about what was happening . That's the reason I shared what I shared. It wasn't a political statement. It was a personal statement.

It might be helpful for LGBTQIA+ people to have conversations showing we're just as nuanced as anybody else in how we see different policies, such as the economy, foreign policy, or domestic policy. When a person has come out as transgender, people need to understand that they aren't necessarily a fill-in-the-political-party or economic-policy blank. It's always better try to understand one another as individuals, rather than making assumptions.

That's why I hold dear to my favorite poem by Howard Thurman:

If I knew you, and you knew me,

And each of us could clearly see,

By that inner light divine,

The meaning of your heart and mine,

I'm sure that we would differ less,

And clasp our hands in friendliness,

If you knew me, and I knew you.

We'll call that a prayer, and close with Amen! Thank you so much for taking the time to share your story. Your courageous "yes" to God's call for authenticity is sure to be encouraging to others.

Thank you for the opportunity to answer these questions. I look forward to having more dialogue in the future.

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If you'd like to learn more about supporting transgender people as they come out, check out Holding on to Hope: Help for friends and family of transgender people.

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About Rev. Phillippa

Rev. Dr. Phillippa Faye Phaneuf is an ordained Elder in the Upper New York Conference of the United Methodist Church.

Following graduation from East Syracuse-Minoa High School and saying goodbye to her high school sweetheart, Liz, she began her musical education studies with an emphasis on vocal performance at Houghton University (A Wesleyan Methodist School in upstate NY). Pursuing ministry efforts more than music teaching, “Phil” transferred and completed her BA in Religion/Philosophy at Roberts Wesleyan University (A Free Methodist School in Rochester, NY). Experiencing some reversals in life, Phil moved away from pursuing the pastoral call within fundamentalist evangelicalism and instead moved toward a teaching degree, which she completed as an MS in Education from the University of Rochester.

With the education degree, Phillippa delved into the world of teaching adults how to work with the latest office and graphic design apps as both an Adobe Certified Expert and Microsoft Office User Specialist. The call to serve in ministry within the United Methodist Church began in 2006 as a youth pastor at Asbury First UMC in Rochester, NY. Immediately beginning seminary at the same time, Phil completed her M.Div. at Colgate Rochester Crozer Divinity School in 2010 as well as being commissioned as a candidate for ordination as an Elder. Her love for continuing education drove her to beginning Doctor of Ministry Studies at Northeastern Seminary immediately following the M.Div. Her dissertation on hybrid discipleship models helped to earn her the D.Min. degree in 2018. Phillippa was ordained in 2018 as well.

Rev. Dr. Phaneuf is currently serving in her 7th year as the pastor of North Chili UMC (next door to Roberts Wesleyan University), in Rochester, NY. Phil has sole custody of her 12 year old daughter, Fiona, and is happily engaged (finally after 37 years of knowing each other was the one!) to her high school sweetheart, Liz.

Phil is a diehard Phillies Phanatic and Eagles fan as well (Phil used to live in Delaware, near Philly), loves jokes, eclectic taste in music, and dabbles in Celtic calligraphy and the Irish flute/whistle.